5 Cereal Oreo Cookies I Want to See from #MyOreoCreation

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While the respective Golden Ages of Hollywood, video games, and breakfast cereal are (arguably) over, there are still plenty of things we’re still in the Golden Age of: memes, on-demand Full House re-runs, and yes, Oreo cookies.

Whereas the 20th century closed with only the most basic of Oreo flavors, and the early 2000s dawdled about with simple novelties like the Uh-Oh Oreo and Oreo Cakesters—which are, to be fair, still my favorite ever Oreo. I will forever lay psychic flowers on their imagined grave—the last couple years have seen a Doubled Stuffed explosion of more wacky Oreo varieties than my non-mathematics degree permits me to count. And now, with the recent, literally explosive release of cracklin’ Fireworks Oreo (and Waffles and Syrup Oreo, which I’ve wanted since I first met Hungry Jack), Oreo is letting fans brainstorm the newest flavor. Sandwich cookie savants can then enter ideas online for a chance to win $500,000, a trip to NYC, and their cookie concept brought to life.

And since we’re also in the Golden Age of me not being able to find enough new products to review—especially not those elusive Jolly Rancher Pop-Tarts that I’ve skulked through enough Walgreens to find that I deserve some kind of disturbed customer loyalty coupon for half off king-sized Peanut M&M’s at any participating Walgreens (or something like that)—I thought it would be fun to think up some cereal-themed Oreo varieties to enter in this #MyOreoCreation sweepstakes.

Cereal’s made it into Oreo cookies before, and Oreo has joined cereal to make the single greatest breakfast of all time, so this mutualistic relationship is proof that there’s enough cereal–Oreo potential to fill a new grocery aisle. We’ll call it the OreO’s aisle. And put it right by checkout so I can make a quick and shameless exit with an armful of crinkling cookie packages at roughly 2am each night.

Anyway, here are 5 Oreo ideas that’ll make Nabisco want to revoke my internet access.

Fake Honey Nut Oreo Cookies

Honey Nut Oreo Cookies

I know honey nut isn’t an exclusive cereal flavor, but as I mentioned in a previous, stomach-churning review…it pretty much is. If Cheerios isn’t the first thing the words “Honey Nut” make you think of, you must be an actual, hyper-intelligent bear who somehow learned to use the internet.

if this is the case: please don’t hurt me: take all the money from my wallet and salmon from my freezer.

Surprisingly, there have never been any honey or almond Oreo flavors before in America, despite each cookie’s obvious resemblance to a macaron. There have been graham Oreo wafers before, but I think it’s about time the creme itself got a hot injection of nutty buckwheat. This is probably the most realistic option on my list, which is why I’m nearly 100% confident everyone, their grandma, and their weird beekeeping uncle have already thought of it.

Guess I’ll have to stop pulling punches and get weirder.

Fake Island Berry Cereal Oreo Cookies

Island Berry Cereal Oreo Cookies

Or should I say, “stop pulling Crunches”?

If you’re still here after that joke, meet perhaps my favorite idea here: the Cap’n Crunch Oreo. Of course, I couldn’t legally use the Cap’n’s notorious name, so I opted for something that more generically covered the tropically fruity and coconut oily flavor of a Crunch Berry, which I imagine would be smushed up and stuffed inside the creme, which would in turn be sandwiched inside a golden wafer that smacks of Cap’n Crunch’s treasure chest pieces. Fruity Crisp Oreo came reasonably close to perfecting the “fruity cereal Oreo” concept, but I want more ambiguous cherry–blueberry and toasted oats, darn it! And I want the cookeis on my desk by 5, with photos of Spider-Man dunking them!

Now that I think about it, the folks behind Neopets Islandberry Crunch could probably still scrounge together a lawsuit against this name if this idea won, but I think they have better things to do.

Like rigging all the Poogle Races that I totally should have won back in my youth.

Fake Raisin Bran Oreo Cookies

Raisin Bran Oreo Cookies

Wait, wait! Before you boo me out of the room on this one, just hear me out:

There would be crunchy honey granola bits inside the creme.

Okay fine. I’ll see myself out.

Fake Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop-Tart Oreo Cookies

Overcooked Brown Sugar Cinnamon Toaster Pastry Oreo Cookies

Oreo cookies and Pop-Tarts are two of my favorite “you shouldn’t be eating these, but they make you feel like a kid again so what the heck, dig in” treats, so I’d love to see the two team up in sandwich cookie form—after all, Pop-Tarts has a Cookies & Creme variety, so it’s only fair that Oreo should return the flavor.

The problem is that most of Pop-Tart’s popular flavors have already been made into Oreo cookies, and “Jolly Rancher Frosted Sour Green Apple Oreo” is a little too specific, even for my tastes. That’s why I thought it’d be fun to put a twist on a famous Pop-Tart—sorry Perry Mason: “toaster pastry”—with an extra flavor that you only can get from a Pop-Tart: the golden brown and darkly caramelized, sweet, sweet revenge of a forgotten toaster.

I don’t know whether this mouthwatering malt would be infused into the creme or the cookie, but I do know one thing: each Overcooked Brown Sugar Cinnamon Toaster Pastry Oreo Cookie would have a segmented creme center—just like Filled Cupcake or Chocolate Strawberry Oreo—that’s hotter than lava and horribly burns your tongue.

What? It’s all about the authentic experience!

Fake Cinnamon Toast Crunch Oreo Cookies

That Last Spoonful of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. You Know, The One That’s Pretty Much All Cinnamon Sugar and Milk? Yeah, That One. Oreo Cookies

Speaking of cinnamon and bad ideas, here’s my magnum opus. Perfectly flavored like the last spoonful of the last bowl from a bag of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and stuffed with cinna-cereal crunchies, this hyper-sweet cereal milk Oreo would melt through molars like Godzilla’s breath through a butter-filled balloon—and taste about as sweetly spicy.

If you couldn’t tell by the copyright-infringing name, poor PhotoShop job, and the fact that these would pretty much just taste like Cinnamon Bun Oreo cookies, I kind of ran out of steam with this idea. Oh well, Mondelez International probably already put me on their “no-fly list” three Oreo ideas ago. I’ll just make my own TLSoCTCYKTOTPMACSaMYTO cookies by steeping a Golden Oreo in my own cereal endmilk.

If you don’t hear from me in a week, I probably drowned face first in it.

Thanks for checking out #MyOreoCreations: I owe you all a mummified Oreo Cakester and five minutes of your life back. If you see any great ideas I missed or just want to share your own, feel free to do so in the comments, and check out the contest’s full rules here. Now to see how many of these I can tweet before Oreo blocks me.

11 responses »

  1. wow Dan! Those are actually amazing ideas!
    (ok except the CTC idea… but you already said it. it would taste most likely exactly like cinnamon bun and it’s imho way to…. “common”(?) ^^)

    I can see every one of them work out.
    – “Honey Nut” Oreos!? – Why didn’t i think about it (OK, we don’t have Honey Nut Cheerios here and i never had them, so the reason why the idea never came to my mind is crystal clear…). This actually a winner flavor. If xou can: SUBMIT IT!
    Not sure if Nabsico is able to make it work since they have to alter their sweeeeeet vanilla creme more into a smoother more balanced sweetness with a hint of honey without loosing the destinctive vanilla oreo flavor, but if so: this is THE oreo flavor the golden oreos should’ve tasted like from the start 😀

    – I can see were this idea comes from, but i would be too afraid of nabisco just “re-leasing” the Fruity Crisp Oreos. With re-releasing i mean, they would most probably try to do Cap’n Crunch Berries some good, but in the end the taste will be the same. 🙁

    – I know, you’re always kinda embarrassed when it comes to your raisin love and i know there are just to kinds opf people: “the ones that love raisins and the ones that don’t”, but this is the second idea you should submit. Why? It’s different and will work out, if nabisco is not messing things up and come out with a sweet vanilla grape flavor that is just called “raisin creme”.
    And i know you were going for the golden cookie here, but i could even think of a “double raisin campaign” featuring Raisin Bran Oreos with golden oreo cookies and Raisinette Oreos with the chocolate cookie. Since chocolate and raisins work out pretty well. 🙂

    – Brown Sugar and Pastries/cookies is also a safe winner. I think they should keep that in mind, but it’s not my favorite idea here. 😀

    – Already said everything abaout CTC-Oreos 😉

    ————-
    While rweading your ideas i got an idea myself and unfortunately i can’t submit it (i can but won’t wind), so feel free to use it and submit it. (Just think about me if you win ;))
    – What about a CreamPop (CreamCicle) Oreos (Yeah that comes from my never fullfilled dream to get a bowl of Cap’n Crunch’s Orange Creampop Crunch)?^^
    Vanilla orange flavored cream in between a cap’n crunch flavored cookie. 🙂
    (or just their normal vanilla cream between an orange flavored golden oreo cookie; whatever works best) 😉 ^^

    Thanks for this btw! Though i really want Cereal Oroes now… -.-
    😉

      • Ah damn! There goes my idea… 🙁
        That was before way before my annoying “foodie time”… 😉
        Though even if not, i loose track of what oreo and pop-tart flavors already existed since it’s hard to remember them when you can’t taste and try them ^^

        Thanks for the link Dan. Seemed they were pretty good 🙂

    • How about waffle crisp?? oh wait… (new waffle)
      How about fruity pebbles?? oh wait.. (new crisp)
      How about thin mint?? oh wait… (mint oreos)
      How about vanilla life?? oh wait… (golden oreo)
      How about cookie crisp?? oh wait.. (cookie dough)
      How about franken berry?? oh wait… (berry ice cream oreo)
      How about rice krispy treats?? oh wait.. (marshmallow krispie oreo)
      How about apple jacks?? oh wait… (caramel apple oreo)

      Sorry for that, that was fun. Great thread.

      • Ha! qed!
        That brings us back to “Raisin Bran Oreos! 😉

        oooor Lion Oreos with one half caramel and one half normal/white cream (milk) between two chocolate cookies. 😉
        (except there already was a caramel flavored oreo editions besides the apple caramel i also don’t know of ^^)

  2. I know it’s not a cereal flavor, but I’d go with Cannoli Pastry Oreos.

    Maybe a Lucky Charms Oreo? Or Trix flavored.

    • I’m not really sure if the Lucky Charms Idea is so great (FOR OREOS!) actually.
      Yes, it’s a fantastic Cereal straight out of hell, but isn’t it just the cereals best “Marshmallow Version”?
      The amazing marbits and the hearty oat cereal pieces are obviously the best and most balanced combination when it comes to “marshmallowy” flavored cereal especially, when combinet with milk.
      But is this combination also a winner for cookies? Especially Oreo?
      I mean let’s break it down… it would be a cream with a marshmallow taste between to oat cookies. No?
      While i love the idea and would like to see such cookies, i’m not sure if nabsico is able to stray away from their “oreo cookies” that far.
      I think they will mess up the cookie part here. either too bland or just too sweet. Or both! Two bland cookies, with actual NO oat flavor, that have a just sugary sweet and even sweeter marshmallow creme between them. xD

      And while i know Lucky Charms cereal pieces aren’t packed with flavor i would love to see McVitties make a Marshmallow “Oreo”. The Oat Cookies like “HobNobs” or their classic “Digestives” cookie would most probably work pretty well with a marshmallow cream. 🙂

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