Review: Post Honey Bunches of Oats Crunch O’s: Honey and Almond

IMG_1315Could it be? Do I really no longer have to waste my time mixing Honey Bunches of Oats with Honey Nut Cheerios to create my favorite FrankenCereal creation: Honey Nut Bunches of CheeriOats?

There are few cereal combos I love more than the sticky, nutty rings of Honey Nut Cheerios tag-teaming it with the crispy flakes and earthy, rich clusters of Honey Bunches of Oats. But think of the hassle it takes to prepare a bowl: I have to grab a box, pour it into a bowl, then grab another box, and pour that one too! Even Atlas couldn’t shoulder this burden.

Oh, and did I mention that I have to physically mix the two with my spoon like some antiquated pilgrim on her butter churn? C’mon, it’s the 21st century, people!

But no longer, because Post has released Honey Bunches of Oats Crunch O’s, in both Honey and Almond flavors. These cereals combine the Honey Bunches we know and love with crunchy oat ovals, thus maximizing my morning laziness.

But do the flavors of these cereals stack up to my manual concoctions?  Well churn my butter and call me Jebediah, because we’re about to find out.IMG_1320

Let’s start with Honey Crunch O’s, because SPOILER ALERT: they’re a lot more boring than their almond cousins. The base cereal tastes exactly like normal honey-flavored Honey Bunches of Oats. I’m not sure what I was expecting—molasses? nacho cheese? calamari?—but in a blind taste test, I wouldn’t be able to tell this stuff apart from plain ol’ Honey Bunches.

You have the super fragile, airy flakes that disintegrate into dust if you so much as stare at them for a few seconds. You have the addictive granola bunches, which range in size from “Honey, I Shrunk the Bunches!” to “It’s not just a boulder, it’s a rock!

The flakes provide a pleasant, sweet corn flavor base, while the crunchy bunches ooze rich, authentic honey flavor that tastes like it’s just been milked from the udders of a bee or a sunflower.

I…don’t actually know how honey is made.

Oh, and you also have the O’s, of course. I’m sad to say that these oat rings are closer to plain Cheerios than they are to Honey Nut Cheerios. Texture-wise, they have a slightly heftier crunch than any Cheerio variety. Taste-wise, however, their plain oat flour base is only scantily-clad in a honey gloss so thin that they’d get public indecency tickets if I ate ’em in public.

There’s none of that tasty almond oil, almond extract, almond nectar, or whatever other nutty essence they suck out of poor almonds—the kind I’d get by mixing in my own Honey Nut Cheerios.

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But speaking of almonds, perhaps Honey Bunches of Oats’ Almond Crunch O’s are more interesting. And here’s another SPOILER ALERT: they totally are.

I’m just going to say this outright, because if I said it later you wouldn’t believe me. These Almond Crunch O’s taste like pumpkin spice lattes. Feel free to call me crazy, because I might be. But first, let me elaborate.

Back in autumn of 2015, Mars released a Pumpkin Spice Latte variety of M&M’s. I loved them so much (shameless plug) that I stockpiled enough of ’em to last me until the choco-apocalypse. I still ration them to this day, and a side-by-side taste test reveals that my almond Honey Bunches are pretty much these M&M’s in cereal form.

I’m certainly not saying this cereal tastes like pumpkins, because the M&M’s don’t, either. What I’m saying is that whatever artificial roasted almond syrup Post added to these Honey Bunches is suspiciously similar to whatever artificial roasted pumpkin spice syrup Mars used in theirs.

Or maybe someone at the Honey Bunches factory just got their “nuts” mixed up with their “nutmegs.” Rookie mistake.

Sure, the healthy handful of almond slivers in every bowl of Almond Crunch O’s provide a welcome, genuine toasted nuttiness, but it’s not enough to overcome the strange, yet compelling autumn spiced cappuccino overtones.

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Milk has a similar effect on both cereals. The thirsty flakes and clusters suck up milk until they become creamy, saturated mounds of honey and/or almond mush. Those who like their cereal soggy will feel right at home, while all others might want to check their 2% at the door.

All in all, neither variety was terribly impressive. While I won’t deny that they were tasty, these new cereals are priced pretty highly. I could buy cinderblock-sized boxes of Honey Bunches of Oats and Honey Nut Cheerios for a better price and a much better taste (even if that means I have to work like an 18th century milkmaid), so I doubt I’ll buy either Crunch O’s variety again.

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Except for maybe the almond ones. My M&M supply is running low and there’s still no sign of the choco-apocalypse.


 

The Bowl: Honey Bunches of Oats Honey Crunch O’s and Honey Bunches of Oats Almond Crunch O’s

The Breakdown: Honey Crunch O’s are a slightly less interesting and much less economic Honey Bunches of CheeriOats, so only the most dedicated Honey Bunch completionists need apply. Almond, on the other hand, might be a nice novelty for those jonesing for a pumpkin spice latte fix in the middle of summer.

The Bottom Line (Honey): 6.5 Honey Bunches of Calamari out of 10

The Bottom Line (Almond): 7.5 horsemen of the choco-apocalypse out of 10

(Quick Nutrition Facts: 130 calories, 7 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein per 3/4 cup serving)

One response »

  1. You’re quite busy these days, aren’t you Dan? ^^
    And although my huge and time consuming comment and question on theimppulsivebuy on your airhead review got somehow lost in the nirvana of the internet it can’t be helped, but i have to comment on your great reviews again and again xD

    So: i’m suprized these HBOs variants turned out to be a letdown for you. Turns out Post was going a bit too healthy with them using “plain cheerios” instead of their frosted brothers. But thanks to this FrankenCereal creation i finally got an idea how to use up my multi grain cheerios, just throw a bunch of them in a my beloved cornflakes/fruit/oat bowl for a bit more crunch.

    btw pumpkin spiced latte cereal sounds actually quite tempting xD
    i also like the pumpkin spice latte flavor, though this year was the first time i was able to try the “original pupkin spice latte” from starbucks, which finally got it’s debut here in germany, i think it’s an interesting and unique flavor for a cereal aside from all the chocolate and honey/maple stuff. ^^

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