I have to say, that of all the ring-shaped foods out there, I’m pretty glad doughnuts are the only ones that have been into not just one cereal, but several.
It’s not that I wouldn’t love to try a bagel, ditalini pasta, bundt cake, or onion ring: it’s just that I think the world at large, in its current state, is not ready to handle such concentric, near-Olympian power in their breakfast bowl. It’d be like if the Chaos Emeralds married the Dragon Balls.
Whew, hope you’re still reading after that horrible intro. My doughnut-based creativity has run drier than a stale cruller after talking so highly about Kellogg’s other Donut Shop cereal: Pink Donut. That stuff tasted like delightful animal crackers, so like Lard Lad, I’m already holding this Donut Shop Chocolate Donut Cereal to high standards.
But enough babbling, let’s get gobbling.
These tiny doughnuts already lose major points for being too small to dunk in coffee without getting burned to an obtuse degree, but they immediately get those points back for being cute and chunky with a soft crunch and pleasantly pillowy mouthfeel.
Like their tickled-pink brethren, Kellogg’s Chocolate Donuts taste very Keebler-esque. With a hybrid choco-flavor that simultaneously smacks of creamily buttered, nearly oily fudge and airily granulated devil’s food cake, each handful of Chocolate Donut Cereal I tried reminded me of a Hostess Cupcake—but a Hostess Cupcake that was filled with E.L. Fudge Cream.
This cereal is pretty sweet, at times it reeks of unoriginality—the chocolate flavor here echoes other cereals: Krave, Keebler Cereal, and even Oreo O’s—and like Pink Donut it’s more “cupcake” than “doughnut” (and it suffers the same cupcake-ian perils of airy, wispy flavor). But overall, it’s a very solid and pleasant weekend munchie, perfect for filling the void that forms when you sleep through church on Sunday only to find out that it was “Coffee & Doughnuts” week.
I can’t be the only one who suffered through that particular 10th glazed ring of Hell, right?
Adding milk to Chocolate Donut Cereal is a double-iced sword. On one hand, the soft, nearly powdery doughnuts suck up just enough milk to make them as delightfully moist as their real namesake baked goods. But milk also washes away most of the cereal’s fudgy nuances, leaving behind a milk chocolate cereal that is, ironically, pretty vanilla.
It’s for that reason, too, that Kellogg’s Chocolate Donut cereal is destined to score just below its rose-tinted sibling. Pink Donut just had a more complexly unique flavor—layers of vanilla included. But since both are surprisingly pleasant cereals worthy of a bakery’s showcase—you know, the one with the flipbook of fancy, action figure-topped cakes that no one has ordered since the Taft administration—I’m left yearning for even more flavors to come in this Donut Shop cereal line.
Heck, I’d even welcome a Bagel Shop cereal line with open, increasingly flabby arms.
The Bowl: Kellogg’s Donut Shop Chocolate Donut Cereal
The Breakdown: With a flavorful high-five of fudge and cocoa cake, Chocolate Donut cereal is a simple, yet simply satisfying chocolate treat that’s worth trying one, if not a half-baker’s dozen times.
The Bottom Line: 8 Keebler Elf x Twinkie the Kid fan fictions out of 10