Tag Archives: golden grahams

15

May. ’22

Review: General Mills Filled Bites (Prototypes?)

New General Mills Filled Bites Cereal Review – Boxes

Allow me to preface this review with the disclaimer that I honestly have no idea if these Filled Bites will ever hit mainstream shelves. I first heard about these two cereals via the insider tip of a Hy-Vee worker at a Minneapolis location often used as a General Mills new product test store. Then I got these two boxes (with different artwork) from reader Ryan (thank you kindly!), but they also seem like samples. The artwork feels more finalized, but it’s just art on both sides, plus the box is a thinner cardboard than regular cereal boxes.

Plus plus, there’s a landing page out there for a possible Cinnamon Toast Crunch Filled Bites—which, while still apparently in its prototype stage would likely replace Pillsbury Cinnamon Roll here—as CTC no doubt has bigger brand clout with the kids today than portly/chortly ol’ Poppin’ Fresh. That guy lost the youth the minute the similarly glossy Hamburger Helper rhymed him outta relevancy.

Which is all to say that, ultimate widespread legitimacy of these Filled Bites aside, I feel a need to review them, if only to uphold the ephemeral legacy of Fillows—a decidedly dank and decadently dense cereal line that deserved way better. Continue reading →

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25

Mar. ’22

News: General Mills Filled Bites Cereals

General Mills Filled Bites Cereals

General Mills has a commitment problem.

It seems whenever the cereal behemoth finally gets around to releasing a totally new cereal IP, they end up backtracking and lumping it in with an existing, already well-known cereal family. The highest profile case of this occurred with Tiny Toast, which, at the time, got a lot of publicity for being GM’s first truly new cereal brand in over a decade. However, a year later, Tiny Toast was, well, toast—and its two flavors became Strawberry and Blueberry Toast Crunch, both of which were discontinued not long after.

And now, this seems to be happening again, at least in some sense. Remember Fillows? The extremely dense and decadent filled pillow duo from 2019 which also got axed before releasing new flavors? Well, it appears they may be back, albeit with much more prominent cross-branding with existing General Mills properties.

The above photo of two Crispy & Creamy Filled Bites cereals comes courtesy of Michael B., from a Hy-Vee in Minneapolis that is apparently a test store for General Mills—which makes sense, given that’s where the corporation is headquartered. As a test item, it’s therefore unclear when these Filled Bites might hit stores nationwide, nor is it guaranteed that they’ll even get a conventional release at all.

Either way, I sure hope they do. I thought Fillows were criminally underrated as an uber-indulgent dessert cereal, and any cereal that gives Golden Grahams the spinoff respect it deserves is a must-try in my book. What do you think? Which would you try first?

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22

Oct. ’21

News: Coffee Mate Golden Grahams Creamer

New Coffee Mate Golden Grahams Coffee Creamer

January 2022 is gonna be BIG…

…for fans of viscous cereal fluids.

Yes, Coffee Mate, the folks who already brought us Cinnamon Toast Crunch Coffee Creamer, are double dipping into the great big bowl of cereal inspiration for this shining supernova of liquid sweetener known as Golden Grahams Coffee Creamer.

It’s no secret that I’m a Golden Grahams fan—honestly, we need a term for that. Golden Grahamaniacs? In fact, I’m a big fan of all things graham’d, be they crackered or Teddy’d. I even find it quite silly that graham crackers were invented to curb prurient urges, because nothing gets me going like a coffee-dunked sheet of twinkling Honey-Maid goodness.

And now, with this GG (fitting acronym) Coffee Creamer, I can dunk my graham crackers in graham cracker flavored coffee creamer that I’ve poured in my coffee….which I’ve then poured into a bowl of actual Golden Grahams. I expect a Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure villain-tier ability to see through time to develop shortly after. Continue reading →

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27

Jun. ’21

News: Golden Grahams S’Mores Soft-Baked Bars

Golden Grahams Soft-Baked Bars

 

Cereals become bars, bars become cereal. Thus goes the modern breakfast lifecycle: entropy into order, cuboids into crumbles.

Yes, hot off the mountain-scaling heels of CLIF Cereal, Golden Grahams is bringing karmic balance to the bar–cereal continuum with a new S’Mores Soft-Baked Bar.

It’s the same type of treat treatment that Lucky Charms and Cinnamon Toast Crunch already got. Those were good—like pillowy cereal brownies—but personally, I’m betting Golden Grahams will do it even better, mostly because graham (and by extension, S’Mores) is an undefeated taste note in the breakfast aisle.

Golden Grahams Soft-Baked Bars are hitting stores as you read this, so let your eyes glaze over, your watering mouth spilleth over, and head over to your nearest Walmart for your best chance at finding these.

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04

Jan. ’21

News: Cereal-Flavored Carnation Breakfast Essentials

New Carnation Breakfast Essentials Cereal Flavors

To paraphrase Smash Mouth, “well, the year’s new cereals keep comin’, and they don’t stop comin’.” And with a flood that great, it’s no surprise we’re getting some more liquefied cereal delicacies to pair with, you know, the traditional solid kind.

In addition to Coffee Mate Cinnamon Toast Crunch creamer, Nestle is enlisting three more cereal cornerstoners to join their line of Carnation Breakfast Essentials nutritional drinks. That said, it’s honestly pretty baffling to see General Mills and Kellogg’s cereals joining forces here—I love you, Golden Grahams, but you’re hopelessly outnumbered if the Kellogg’s pair turns on you.

Yes, between Froot Loops, Golden Grahams, and Krave Carnation Breakfast Essentials, that’s some pretty impressive coverage of cereal’s three core flavor categories: fruity, honey, and chocolate. You know what? I bet these’ll all taste pretty swell, too. As your resident spindly cereal blogger, I don’t drink a lot of Carnation or other fortified beverages, but the ones I have strike a nice balance of taste and nutrition. Nothing too crazy—I bet these’ll just be like slightly thicker cereal milk. About two steps down in thickness from Kefir.

Let me know if you’ve tried any of these in the comments. I have a feeling I won’t review all of them, but I might give the Krave a try unless someone* recommends against it.

*Someone who isn’t genetically biased against Krave. Y’all know who you are.

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16

Dec. ’20

News: Golden Grahams & Cinnamon Toast Crunch Protein Bars

General Mills New Golden Grahams Protein Bar

It seems 2021 will be the year of, in addition to many other things, buff cereal products. First Pebbles drops protein powder, now General Mills is getting into the protein bar game. What’s next, Kellogg’s Raisin Bran energy gel?

To be fair, General Mills’ Golden Grahams and Cinnamon Toast Crunch protein bars look pretty appetizing, and 20 grams of protein feels pretty standard for the likes of Power Bars or Quest Bars. I’m glad they committed to making a muscle-building munchie instead of a weird, sugary Clif Bar type of hybrid. They can save that idea for Lucky Charms.

You can already find the bars listed on General Mills’ Foodservice and Convenience website, so if you’re trying to track down these cereal protein bars, it seems like gas stations or school cafeterias would be your best bet. Whichever’s easiest.

What do you think? Cereal protein bars: yes or no? Personally, I’ll be defeating the Golden Graham bar’s purpose with a jar of marshmallow fluff.

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17

Sep. ’20

Review: Retro Recipe Golden Grahams (Honey is Back)

Retro Recipe Golden Grahams with Honey Box

I’ve talked about this on the blog before, but I believe there is an understated, yet sacred, beauty to foodstuffs that make the most out of minimal ingredients. This I have dubbed my “Egg & Cheddar on Ciabatta Theorem,” and I hear it’s gaining traction among renowned microgastronomists.

This framework of culinary thought applies to Golden Grahams. Not so much literally, as Golden Grahams have as many peripheral filler ingredients as any processed breakfast cereal, but Golden Grahams have at least maintained an overall brand reputation for unanointed simplicity. Golden Grahams cereal squares taste like honey graham crackers, simple as that. If you want more nuanced flavor, either buy a Golden Grahams Treat or buzz off (presumably into the open arms of Honey Maid S’Mores or Cinnamon Graham cereals).

Yet after decades of chaste cereal pride, leave it to a year like 2020 to see Golden Grahams not only breaking bold new graham ground but also revealing (by way of an apology) a betrayal eight years in the making.

Bam. Smelted Golden Grahams icing on a so-so Toaster Strudel. Boom. A way overripe Golden Grahams S’Mores Remix snack pouch. And now, the grand ka-pow: Retro Recipe Golden Grahams that…bring honey back as an ingredient?

There’s the betrayal. Maybe I’m the most deliberately ignorant Golden Grahams fan, but I had no clue honey left the cereal around 2012—a fact that makes the ’80s box theming feel a little disingenuous.

Regardless, I’m excited to taste real honey in my Golden Graham again. Like Plato’s Allegory of a Cave’s Continental Breakfast, I’ve lived nearly a decade with false faith in the Grahams I spooned before me.

Will this new golden light blind me, or free me?

Continue reading →

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15

Sep. ’20

Spooned & Spotted: General Mills Cereal Remix Pouches

Finally, a cereal snack that will scream D-J KHALED! when you open it.

That’s how remixes work nowadays, right?

Perhaps in line with their recent Retro Recipe debut, General Mills is releasing three pouched portmanteaus that pair familiar cereal pieces with other breakfast guest stars. As first shared by Candy Hunting, these Remixes aren’t quite shelf ready yet, but from what we can see, there’s plenty to speculate about.

The Cinnamon Toast Crunch Remix takes a pretty safe position: CTC squares and Churros join Vanilla Chex for what should be a fairly predictable hyper-sweet Toast Crunch Textural Medley. The Golden Grahams S’Mores Remix is also well-trodden territory for other big cereal companies, so I’m sure the name-brand GG thing will be good, but likely leave me craving a bigger serving.

Chocolate Toast Crunch’s Remix is the biggest surprise here, since Cocoa Puffs is usually General Mills’ flagship chocolate cereal—and I’ve heard from many people claiming Chocolate Toast Crunch has been discontinued, at least in their area. It’s also the only Remix that thinks outside the cereal box, enlisting caramel corn as well as Vanilla Chex again. Given how well H-E-B incorporated popcorn into their own caramel granola, I expect this Remix to be a standout hit, too.

All that said, my excitement for these Remixes is at a meek 5.5/10. Not saying I could’ve designed a more exciting trio of sweets *cough* Honey & Oat Cheerios Oat Crunch, Honey Nut Chex & Pralines *cough* but I faintly hope that if these are just store samples so far, they’ll get enough feedback to crank up the indulgence factor like a Rollercoaster Tycoon ride given a triple corkscrew loop.

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