Tag Archives: rumor

Rumor: What We Know About Splatoon 2 Cereal

Rumored Kellogg's Splatoon 2 Cereal

What’s the cereal equivalent of a Bigfoot hunter? A crisp-tozoologist?

Whatever it is, I want a job doing it for the Smithsonian. Empty Bowl listeners should already be familiar with my love of cereal myths—talking about the same cereal legends all day has me craving a tasty enigma—and much like last year’s Freedom Crunch fiasco, I’m proud to report on another cold cereal case, developing in real time.

It’s about a certain Kellogg’s Splatoon 2 Cereal, and I’ve labelled it a loose rumor, despite having no evidence beyond the photographed screen above. There are a lot of reasons to be skeptical of this possible Nintend-elicious successor to Super Mario Cereal, but other facts that help this story hold milk. Let’s run through the facts:

• This first and only photo came to light just a few days ago, shared by Reddit user /u/carloscd44. They claim to have stumbled upon it on Walmart’s website while looking for other new cereals, but after returning to the page the day after, it was gone, leaving the OP and viewers alike uncertain about its legitimacy.

• To clear up initial fears of fake leaks—a problem that has notoriously plagued the Nintendo Super Smash Bros. community—I confirmed that the URL the OP presented is (or at least was) a real part of Walmart’s site. Now, the link redirects visitors to a page for Super Mario Cereal.

This suggests to me that the cereal was either posted ahead of its planned release, and the URL will remain until it’s time, or Kellogg’s scrapped the cereal concept entirely, and this was a leftover and hitherto undiscovered page.

• While I’d love to believe the former is the case, the clearly unfinished box art presented leaves more questions than answers. Splatoon 2 the video game was first released almost two years ago now, and while the game still releases new content, this time gap is far larger than Super Mario Cereal, which debuted the same month as Super Mario Odyssey.

Back to the box art itself, we can see lots of awkward empty space, seemingly incomplete Inkling models, cereal that cannot be clearly seen, and a logo that bizarrely uses a paint splatter to cover up part of the word CEREAL—which, in itself, appears to use the same font as Super Mario Cereal.

Adding all this up, plus the fact that I can’t dig up any other info about it online, makes me very hesitant to make any confident conclusion on Splatoon 2 Cereal’s legitimacy. In my eyes, the most convincing clue is the timing: the fact that the page went down the same day /u/carloscd44 found it seems like quite the convenient coincidence, but whether I’ll be wrapping my tentacles around a bowl of it or just crossing it off my rumors list with red ink remains to be seen.

If you have any information about Splatoon 2 Cereal, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’ll even play you on Final Destination for it—no items, of course.

Rumor Mill: Three New Kellogg’s Cereals!

kelloggs-rumors

What do the three images above have in common?

Well, they’re all core ingredients in my new, patent-pending-a-restraining-order weight loss formula: Dumpy Dan’s morBID Your Pounds Goodbye Smoothie, which blends together 11 secret carbs and candies to help you lose weight by killing you instantly—thus slowing your metabolism! Best paired with exercise, do not try at home, work, or all.

Jokes aside, each iconic (or at least iconically squishy) food above is the flavorful star of Kellogg’s cereals rumored to be coming soon.

Based on tips from fellow snack food f(r)iends Junk Food Aisle and Candy Hunting, we’ve been able to confirm online grocery database listings for Banana Cream Frosted Flakes, Honey Nut Frosted Flakes, and a potential Peeps Cereal. Unfortunately, none have pictures, but the mental pictures they conjure are enough to leave my taste buds literally watering enough to figuratively fill a marshmallow-bedrocked lagoon.

The first is particularly exciting, because Banana Frosted Flakes have long been a cult favorite since Tony’s more straw-esome days. The second is also intriguing, because if any cereal has the potential to disrupt America’s comparatively wholesome, best-selling cereal, it’s sugar-smacked flakes of corn. After all, when’s the last time you saw a bee take down a tiger?

As for Peeps Cereal, we know very little—I would hope for more than a marshmallow-flavored marshmallow cereal, because ol’ Anthony T. Tiger has pretty much given us that already. Granted, we could be misinterpreting the rumors altogether, because the product’s listed name is “Kellogg’s Licensed Brands Cereal Peeps,” it might mean we’ll be getting Froot Loops and Smorz-flavored Peeps instead of the other way around.

But hey, maybe Kellogg’s is playing the long game, and they’ll just turn that into Froot Loop-flavored Peeps-flavored Cereal. Meta-licious!

Stay tuned to our blog and social media, where I’ll post any updates on this story as it develops. Thanks again to our tipsters—if you know anything more about any new cereals, hit up our Submissions page.

Rumor Mill: Pop-Tarts Crunch Revival!

Finally: a nostalgic reboot that’s got me hopeful again.

From French Milquetoast Crunch to Oreo Oh…s, the cereal industry’s recent revivals of straight-off-the-BuzzFeed-list cult classic morning munchies have all been good, but they lose their luster when compared to the originals. So like every Ghost of a Buster or CGI’d Rugrat, I’ve started viewing cereal remakes with trepidation, guarding my fond memories like a stash of pre-Y2K canned goods.

(I’ll let you all into my bunker if you remember to bring the milk.)

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Kellogg’s Super Mario Cereal Will Feature Select Amiibo Sticker Boxes

Kellogg's Super Mario Cereal Box (Rumored)

Let’s a-go…on an Odyssey to the breakfast aisle!

Goodness knows that it’s been long enough since we’ve seen a Mario-themed breakfast cereal—28 years, in fact, since the Nintendo Cereal System, which packaged two bags of Mario and Zelda cereal in the same box. A man works 60 grueling hours a week fixing leaky sewer pipes, battling demented turtle kings, and cleaning graffiti just to be told his princess is in another castle? He deserves a cereal. Or at least a dedicated pasta brand more esteemed than SpaghettiOs.

And it looks like that might* will** finally happen. After the kind of digital sleuthing that would put Mario is Missing! to shame, I stumbled upon multiple references, including one with the above box art, to an upcoming Super Mario Cereal from Kellogg’s. In true Kelloggian fashion, it pairs oat pieces with colored marshmallow shapes—in this case, crunchy stars are flanked by Super Mushrooms, 1-Up Mushrooms, and ? Boxes. But most importantly, some boxes of this “Mixed Berry” cereal are Amiibos in and of themselves, allegedly able to be used with Super Mario Odyssey for the Nintendo Switch.

I can only assume that it gives Mario a Dig’em the Frog hat, and Snap, Crackle, Pop hats for all the Toads. Either way, I hope an Animal Crossing Cereal is next: Tom Nook’s Crunchy Bells with Real Fruit Bits, anyone? Just shake it up!

*Update: Though the box art may not be finalized, reader Chris has allegedly received confirmation from Kellogg’s that this cereal should be hitting shelves soon! Mamma mia:

“We cerealously appreciate your continued interest in seeing a Nintendo cereal, Chris! We hope you’ll keep an eye out for the new Super Mario Cereal that is hitting store shelves now. This star-shaped cereal features Super Mario-inspired marshmallows, and a limited number of packages will have an Amiibo powerup sticker that can be used on the Super Mario Odyssey game with the Nintendo Switch gaming console. We also appreciate your additional feedback regarding classic cereal favorites, and thanks for taking the time to write!” —@KelloggsUS

**Update 2: While originally a rumor, Super Mario Cereal has now been confirmed through Target, Walmart, and product photographs!

News: Cap’n Crunch’s Orange Creampop Crunch Coming Soon?

IMG_0646 (1) copy

(UPDATE 6/8: Orange Creampop Crunch is real, and we reviewed it!)

We’ve had Peanut Butter Crunch. We’ve munched a baker’s dozen bowls of Sprinkled Donut Crunch. Heck, we’ve even consumed an XL, family-sized movie theater tub of Caramel Popcorn Crunch. If Cap’n Crunch has endorsed it, we’ve eaten it.

So what will the Cap’n debut next to bring forth a tidal wave of drool from the hungry whirlpools of our faces? Well, to paraphrase Man of Popsicle, “If it’s Popsicle, it might be possible.”

As some internet sleuths have uncovered, back on November 5th of last year, Quaker filed a trademark application for CAP’N CRUNCH’S ORANGE CREAMPOP CRUNCH. Maybe Cap’n Crunch’s title should be CAPS LOCK-ing Crunch, instead.

From almost any other cereal brand, I’d be concerned about such a zany flavor idea. But since Cap’n Crunch is the same guy who once casually brought us an exploding volcano cereal, I’d trust him even if he debuted “Cap’n Crunch’s Hot Garbage Juice Crunch.”

No word on when (or even if) Cap’n Crunch’s Orange Creampop Crunch will see the light of day, but my guess would be early to mid-summer. And when it does arrive?  You’d better believe I’ll have a bowl of melted orange sherbet ready to pour it in.

What do you all think of this possible new flavor?