Confession: I haven’t been watching all the Marvel movies that have been released over the past 5 years or so. In my defense, new superhero films seem to come out just as often as new cereals. So how can I be expected to keep up with both?

What this means is that I don’t have any cheeky, topical references to make about Kellogg’s new Captain America Civil War cereal. From what I can conclude based off the box art alone, the movie is about Captain America pissing off Iron Man by trapping him in a bad Instagram filter. In response, Iron Man decides to steal the left side of Captain America’s face.

You know what? I’d see that movie. It sounds like it would be…all right!

As for this cereal (which I spotted at Meijer), it looks like another cookie cutter oats and marshmallows snoozefest. I will give it a couple bonus points, though, because the pastel red and blue shield marshmallows remind me of Bomb Pops. Oh, if only this cereal were cherry, lime, and raspberry flavored.

But hey, from the looks of this cereal’s shelf neighbors, at least Captain America is strong enough to topple Darth Vader.

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Really? Another movie cereal with oat pieces and marshmallows? I understand the desire to stick to traditions, but c’mon, Kellogg’s, can’t you just…let it go?

I apologize if I’ve made that awful joke before, but to be honest, I’ve never seen Frozen, so any jokes I make about it will have to be based off of that single song I know from the movie. I guess when it comes to that particular joke, I just can’t let it go.

Someone please stop me.

And while many cereal aisle regulars know that Frozen cereal has been around for awhile, these new boxes are a little bit different. The original cereal only contained blue and white snowball marshmallows (which Kellogg’s later reused in Froot Loops with Winter Blast Marshmallows, because when it comes to that style of marshmallow, they just couldn’t…you know where I’m going with this).

But this new box (the two images above are from a single box with different images on each side) that I say at Kroger also features swirling blue and purple snowflake marshmallows!

I don’t know if cosmetically different marshmallows will be enough to breathe new life into this cereal line, which also uses the same shape for its oat pieces as Jif cereal (maybe there’s hope for a peanut butter and jelly and marshmallow fluff cereal?). But what I do know is that the addition of “new marshmallows” instantly makes me think of this classic Simpsons scene.

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