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Spooned & Spotted: Post Mixed Berry, Cinnamon Roll, & S’Mores Bites Shredded Wheat

Post Mixed Berry, Cinnamon Roll, and S'Mores Shredded Wheat Cereals

Frosted Mini-Wheats, prepare to Frosted Mini-Meet your maker.

Post Shredded Wheat has been around for a while, but until now, Shredded Wheat hasn’t exactly been the more exciting brand of thatched wheat biscuits. Somehow, kids prefer Frosted Mini-Wheats’ caked-on frosting and oceans of saccharine detritus in their cereal boxes over sugar-free bran and glisteningly sticky roasted nut flavor.

But now all that is about to change. In the wake of what is perhaps Frosted Mini-Wheats’ greatest cereal sin, changing their classy biscuit mascot to some sort of SpongeBobian abomination, Post has debuted three new bite-sized Shredded Wheat varieties. Mixed Berry, Cinnamon Roll, and S’Mores Bites are already excitingly unique flavors on their own, but each new biscuity breed is also filled with flavored chips to (hopefully) make their dry wheat exteriors explode with bursts of berry, vanilla, and chocolate flavor, respectively.

Not since Hidden Treasures Cereal have I been so geeked to get backhanded in the taste buds.

Shoutout to reader Austin K. for sending me this photo from Walmart. I look forward to collecting all three boxes like they’re semisweet-stuffed Pokémon cards, mixing all three into a single bowl, and playing a dangerous game of berry bushel/bakery/bonfire roulette.

If you’ve got a cereal photo of your own to share, snap, crackle, and pop right on over to our submissions page!

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News: Honey Maid S’mores Cereal Keeps the Flame Alive

New Honey Maid S'mores Cereal with Madagascar and More

New Honey Maid S’mores Cereal (Left) with its Ancestors

Apparently cereal isn’t like baseball: there’s no “three s’mores and you’re out” policy.

Post, the Honey Bunch-slinging, Oreo O’s-reviving parent company of Malt-O-Meal, has announced that even after launching Madagascar S’mores Jungle Party, Canadian S’Mores Cereal, and Malt-O-Meal S’mores, they’ll be raising a toast(ed marshmallow) to one more graham–’mallow–chocolate cereal with new Honey Maid S’Mores Cereal.

Debuting this month (if not now in your local Walmart: check Post’s store locator) alongside a probably-far-more-popular-with-no-offense-to-s’mores-because-come-on-it’s-cookies-for-breakfast cereal, newly introduced Oreo O’s, Honey Maid S’mores combines ridged honey graham squares, chocolate puffs, and mini marshmallows to re-create everyone’s favorite campfire treat.

Well, almost everyone: I prefer roasting Cheez-Its for that extra extra toasty effect.

Though it’s unlikely that Honey Maid S’mores will taste any different than its breakfast aisle kinfolk, I’m sure I’ll still buy it anyway. If only so I can give my Teddy Grahams officially licensed honey graham surfboards to ride on.

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News: Oreo O’s are Coming Back to America, 10 Years Later!

New American Oreo O's Cereal 2017 Cookies & Cream

(Image via Post)

I’m Oreo O-verjoyed.
I’m Oreo O-ver the moon.
I’m bellowing “Oreo O-h yeah!” to the skies, heavens, and great sandwich cookie cosmos above.

Yes, friends, neighbors, countrymen, and dunkers: Oreo O’s, your favorite ’90s cereal or probably favorite cereal ever, is coming back. In the year 2017.

On the 20th anniversary of its debut and the 10th anniversary of its tragic discontinuation in the States, news has broken—and subsequently broken the internet in two like a twisted apart cookie—that Post has brought its iconic, cookies and creme flavored cereal back from our nostalgic memories and into reality. Of course, the cereal has been around in South Korea for nearly a decade now—a fact that I’ve well-documented—but its high price of important made it out of reach for all but the most “devoted” (by which I mean “questionably sane” and by which I also mean me).

These new Oreo O’s should be hitting shelves in early June, so start prepping some garage space to stockpile boxes. Heck: maybe Nabisco will even re-release S’Mores Oreos so we have something to eat during our Walmart parking lot campouts.

Before I leave you all to bathe in a palpable sea of nostalgia, this new Oreo O’s news does come with a cumbersome (or “crumbersome,” if you will) caveat. Malt-O-Meal, which is owned by Post, already released a Cookies & Cream Oreo O’s doppelgänger. This taste-alike is pretty good, but it still can’t match the dense, buttery flavor of the Korean kind—which I consider to be the true original.

This new Post Oreo O’s revival looks eerily similar to Cookies & Cream, leading me to worry that “new” Oreo O’s are just repackaged C&C and not, in fact, the real Oreo O.G. A Post spokesperson claims that, “Fans of the iconic OREO O’s cereal will find the product has stayed true to its roots,” but as, arguably, the world’s biggest Oreo O’s fan (wait ’til I put that on my resume), I have one thing left to say:

Be ready to put your money where my mouth is. Or something like that.

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Review: Trolls Cereal (Rainbow Crunch)

Post Trolls Cereal Rainbow Crunch Box Review

Movie cereals are like grizzly bears. And Post’s new Trolls Rainbow Crunch cereal is living proof.

No, I don’t that movie cereals taste like salmon and ruin your campsite. Rather, they just like to hibernate—for very long periods of time. See, back in cereal’s Golden Age, movie cereals had heart: fortified heart. From double-crunching C-3PO’s to Reese’s Pieces-flavored E.T. cereal, these cinematic cereals were as innovative as they were memorably tasty.

But then the breakfast film industry must have crashed, or at least fell asleep. Because for what felt like decades, every movie cereal was basic and bland. Most were either cheap Lucky Charms knock-offs or some generically fruity or chocolaty puffed shape. No franchise was safe, from Shrek and Shrek 2 to Shrek and seriously why the heck were there so many Shrek cereals

But very recently, matinee meals have been stirring from their slumber, returning once more to the creative concepts of their more marquee-worthy years. Minions Banana Berry cereal was a crunchy smoothie. Disney Princess cereal is rethinking the tired oats ‘n’ ‘mallows gambit. Batman and Superman fought with volleys of caramel-iciousness and fondued berries.

And now? Trolls Rainbow Crunch Cereal—based on a 2017 DreamWorks movie based on a bug-eyed, soft-serve-haired fad toy from the 1960s—is bringing peace to the world of fruity cereals. Continue reading

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Review: New and Improved Alpha-Bits Cereal

Post New and Improved Alpha-Bits Cereal Box Review

The year is 20xx. Innovation is dead. No new cereals are ever released. Instead, every old brand keeps releasing “New and Improved” versions that buff their old selves with unnecessary flavor and cosmetic improvements.

Froot Loops now contains “100% more Froot Jooce” and comes in colors only visible to the hyper-photoreceptive mantis shrimp. Waffle Crisp is now just a box full of freeze-dried Belgian waffles—and the bag is made of intelligent, gelatinous maple syrup that can gain sentience when stored in certain climates. Cinnamon Toast Crunch just contains packets of wheat seeds, yeast, and cinnamon, with instructions for growing, harvesting, and baking your own miniature cinnamon toast.

As for Alpha-Bits? They now contain the letters of every alphabet, from English and Cyrillic to Egyptian hieroglyphics, Klingon, and whatever language the Bionicles spoke. Some also say that spiking a drop of blood into your morning bowl of Alpha-Bits will make them reveal the universe’s existential secrets.

But most agree that’s just ridiculous.

This revamped cereal revolution all started in 2017, as Cocoa Puffs, Krave, Honeycomb, and yes, Alpha-Bits, made a big hullaballoo about self-improvement. As a designated cereal emissary of the year 2017, I’m here to tell you whether Alpha-Bits actually followed through on their “new year, new me” promise, or if they’re just “new meh.” Continue reading

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Review: Honeycomb Cereal (Now with Bigger Flavor!)

Post Bigger Flavor Honeycomb Cereal Box

Not since Andre the Giant menacingly knocked on the Honeycomb Hideout’s window have I been so geeked to eat a bowl of Honeycomb cereal.

Sure, the stuff has had fun flavor iterations—Strawberry, Chocolate, Cinna-Graham—and it even briefly got “Twisted Marshmallows” 3 years back in a decades-late attempt to capitalize on the “X-Treme Snax” movement of the radical ’90s. But it has also progressively lost its flavor, as not one, but two ill-received formula changes in the early 2000s left Honeycomb a squishy and styrofoam-y compared to the golden-smacked Golden God it was before the turn of the century.

All that BIG HONEY TASTE Andre had roared about went to go live on a bee farm upstate, so to speak.

But this newly revamped Honeycomb boasts a “bigger flavor,” in a charming homage to those days when the cereal hung its hat on its humongous honey-ness. This change comes in the midst of a wider cereal flavor revolution, as Cocoa Puffs and Krave have added “50% more cocoa” and “more chocolate,” respectively. But while those two put an easy-to-measure qualifier on their taste changes, Honeycomb’s flavor is now simply “bigger,” which could either mean they added more honey or hired fatter bees.

Either way, I’m  going to try them while I wait for my Giant sideburns to grow in.  Continue reading

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Review: Banana Bread Shreddies Cereal (From Post Canada)

Canadian Post Banana Bread Shreddies Box Cereal Review

Canada’s immigration website is about to crash again.

No, that wasn’t a politically motivated prediction—this blog is non-partisan, except for when it comes to the S’Mores Jungle Party. I just think that America’s northern neighbors are about to see a whole lot more hungry tourists once word gets out about Post’s new Canada-exclusive Banana Bread Shreddies Cereal.

See, the U.S. has a tragic drought of banana-flavored cereals. Sure, we have plenty of Banana Republic stores and enough bad ukulele covers of Jack Johnson’s “Banana Pancakes” to fill an audiobook, but if we want banana in our cereal, it’s oatmeal, Great Grains Banana Nut Crunch, or nothing. All the great banana breakfasts of our time, from 1981’s Banana Frosted Flakes to last year’s Minions Banana Berry Cereal, have left us for the great jungle in the sky where all bananas go when they grow brown and mushy.

Canadian Post Banana Bread Shreddies Back of the Box Cereal Review

And speaking of brown bananas, we’ve never had a strictly banana bread-flavored cereal. The cozy flavor of Grandma’s kitchen seems perfect for a bite-sized breakfast, which is why these Banana Bread Shreddies are sure to pique the curiosity of humans, monkeys, and Raffis everywhere.

So let’s renew our passports and peel open a box of it. Continue reading

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Review: Pecan & Maple Brown Sugar Honey Bunches of Oats

Post Pecan & Maple Brown Sugar Honey Bunches of Oats Cereal Box

Has Honey Bunches of Oats been taking lessons from Nintendo?

Because Nintendo is the master of releasing “upgrades” that are actually wholly new, entirely better products. The Nintendo Entertainment System and the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. The Game Boy and the Game Boy Advance. The Wii and the Wii U. Luigi and Waluigi. The list goes on.

Post must be studying in Mario’s dojo, because even though Pecan & Maple Brown Sugar Honey Bunches of Oats are billed as an “improved” version of their old Pecan Honey Bunches of Oats, I can already tell this new cereal’s going to render its predecessor totally obsolete.

Which is a good thing, because you can’t even buy Pecan Honey Bunches of Oats any more. How do I know? Because one look at Honey Bunches of Oats’s Facebook page reveals a dedicated legion of Pecan Honey Bunch lovers who continually mourn the loss of their dearly beloved, roasted nut-flavored breakfast product.

Well, let’s just hope this cult following approves of Pecan & Maple Brown Sugar Honey Bunches of Oats. Otherwise there might be a nutty Internet meltdown, the likes of which hasn’t been seen since 2016’s infamous Hostess Suzy Q fiasco. Continue reading

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