Tag Archives: graham

Review: CinnaGraham Toast Crunch

*Extremely Ferris Bueller voice*

You’re still here? It’s over. Go home—then get in your car and go to the store and buy this cereal!

Seriously, you need a review to tell you that CinnaGraham Toast Crunch is good? You’d think it would only take one look at the box above to stoke the very same deep, primal hunger for cinnamon-coated graham goodness that helped early humans evolve beyond simple hunter-gatherers and into sophisticated graham miners, their crude pickaxes chiseling away at vast veins of golden grain.

I joke, but seriously: there’s something about graham, be it crackered, pie crusted, or Teddy’d, that just gets my motor runnin’, directly counterintuitive to the anti-prurient origins of the foodstuff itself. And since, two years ago, we already got a spiritual predecessor to this CinnaGraham Toast Crunch in the form of Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal—which I called my Cereal of the Year—I went into this review beyond confident that General Mills’ latest Toast Crunch crusader couldn’t possibly fail.

But what if I told you…I was wrong? Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: cinnamon, general mills, graham, toast crunch. 5 Comments

Jul. ’20

Review: Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal

This is a momentous review. The kind of review that deserves a content warning: this article contains atomically divisive statements, polarizing particles capable of sparking a potential second Cereal Civil War—we all remember the seismic defeat of Quake by Quisp in the Great Quaker Quarrel of ’71. Anyway, if you made it through that sentence, I figure you’re ready to weather my scalding hot take:

Post’s Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal is better than Cinnamon Toast Crunch. In fact, it’s not even close—it’s a bona fide cinnamon slobber-knocker. For with one sweet and sweeping swing of its ingredients list, Honey Maid Graham Cereal simply bests CTC at a foundational level, rendering it undeserving of further comparison.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch is one of the most popular cereals of all time. That’s why I’m ready to accept the zinger slings and meme arrows of many doubtful Cinnamon Toast Crunchers. But I advise you, before saying more, to try a box of Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal for yourself and decide. You may not agree, but I doubt you’ll be disappointed you tried. Anyway, on to the real meat of this graham-burger beefcake of a new cereal.

Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: cinnamon, graham, post. 12 Comments

Jul. ’18

Review: Malt-O-Meal & Cold Stone Creamery Our Strawberry Blonde Cereal

Are you prepared for this responsibility?

I sure hope so, because we already have this Strawberry Blonde. It’s not just your Strawberry Blonde or my Strawberry Blonde.

This is Our Strawberry Blonde, so if you weren’t ready to telekinetically eat this cereal with me, then you shouldn’t have decided to trade your usual Cocoa Krispies for an infant-sized bag containing a revolutionary gastronomic feat that blends honey graham squares (Golden Grahams who had their identities stolen), strawberry puffs (rarely seen pieces that I hope were stolen from the JIF PB&J dumpster at the Kellogg’s factory), and the perennial favorite: “marshmallows” (looking as amorphously rotund as always).

It’s a daring pairing, but after witnessing the transformative taste bud magic of Malt-O-Meal and Cold Stone Creamery’s other cereal pairing, I wouldn’t be surprised if this reunification of three potent cereal powers turns saucily sorcerous.

Care to scream with me?

Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 9 rating, graham, ice cream, malt-o-meal, marshmallows, strawberry. 9 Comments