What does America taste like? It seems Pop-Tarts is having a tough time figuring it out.

They’ve tried the obvious. They’ve tried to distill the essence of our diets. And they’ve tried two other Red, White & ___ flavors before ditching the generic Berry and misplaced Cherry (which works neither chromatically nor rhythmically) for Blueberry.

Red, White & Blueberry Pop-Tarts may make more sense than its previous flagged flavors, though I do wish they’d get right to the heartland of America and make Superman Ice Cream Pop-Tart—they already have DC’s blessing!

Proudly baked in the USA* without oxford (or any) commas, Red ⭑ White & Blueberry Pop-Tarts have already been spotted at Market Basket and Jewel Osco stores (with complete nutrition info), according to The Impulsive Buy. But in keeping with the recent tradition of weird places to buy breakfast products, you can pick up a box of RW&B Pop-Tarts from…Menards?…and get a $0.21 mail-in rebate to boot!

Think of all the penny whistles and MoonPies you could buy with that!

If you have any new breakfast news of your own to wave proudly, hoist it on over to our Submissions page. If I don’t put it on this blog, I’ll at least cram it in my toaster.

*Google seems to think all Pop-Tarts are made domestically, and there is indeed a Pop-Tarts factory not far from me.