How exactly do you de-caramelize something?
Sure, you could grab some Barbasol and shave a caramel apple, but it would be much harder to cleanly disembowel a Rolo, power wash some caramel corn, or exorcise a Werther’s Original.
And I bet it would be downright impossible to synthesize the caramel out of a Caramel Apple Pop-Tart, so while we have yet to hear if Kellogg’s delightfully golden-juiced toaster pastries will be returning this year, we do know the brand’s autumnal fair will soon be joined by Crisp Apple. So this could be Caramel Apple unmasked, or Crisp Apple Pop-Tarts could just be the spiritual successor to the busheled lineage of apple Pop-Tarts flavors that have already come and gone.
Apple Cinnamon. Apple Blast. Apple Strudel. American Apple Pie. Apple Cinnamon Muffin. Jolly Rancher Green Apple. The list goes on—heck, Apple Currant was even one of Pop-Tarts opening flavors. But the unconventionally named Crisp Apple Pop-Tarts—were they not named Apple Crisp to avoid the cinnamon dessert-esque connotations?—rather than an inside-out apple pie, look more like Apple Blast than anything, with a simple sheet-ghost frosting and likely beige filling.
As first reported by Candy Hunting, these will be an exclusive Pop-Tart flavor, but we don’t know where at yet. So while there’s an outside chance your local orchard is growing an exclusive strain of them, Crisp Apple’s jumbo packaging suggests, at least to me, that a big box store like Walmart might be a better place to camp.
It won’t stop me from doing my Johnny Appleseed cosplay, though!
