Tag Archives: 6 rating

Classic Review: Post Raisin Bran Cereal

I’ve been on a long quest to review every raisin bran cereal imaginable, a quest so exhaustive that I bran out of “raisin bran” puns months ago.

Wait, guess I had one more in me.

Having travelled far, eaten a lot, and picked many raisins out of tricky tooth crevasses, it’s time for me to return again to raisin bran’s humble origins. Not all the way back—I’ve already reviewed the first raisin bran ever created—but still back to 1942, when Post Raisin Bran debuted in the same year as Kellogg’s Raisin Bran, a simultaneous release that I can only imagine ended in West Side Story-esque rivalries between street gangs loyal to each respective bran brand.

But is Post the Raisin Bran with the most, or does Kellogg’s smiling sun melt away the competition? Time to unsheathe my spoon, ready my dental floss, and find out. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, post, raisin bran. 23 Comments

Nov. ’16

Review: Quaker “Bring Your Best Bowl” Oatmeal Finalists

Wait, does this mean my “PB&J Oatmeal” idea got rejected?

And my “Double Stuf Oreo Oatmeal” idea, too? Even my “Neapolitan Oatmeal,” “Thanksgiving Leftovers Oatmeal,” and intentionally redundant “Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pie Oatmeal” ideas? All thrown in the trash heap?

Okay fine, Quaker Oats guy, I’ll accept this criminal oversight, only because the flavor finalists in your user-submitted “Bring Your Best Bowl” contest sound pretty darn good. There were over 500,000 entries for the competition earlier this year, but only three tempting tastes remain: Vanilla Chai Oatmeal, Lemon Ricotta Pancake Oatmeal, and Apple Cheddar Rosemary Oatmeal.

To pick the winner, Quaker has slapped all three finalists into a single box. It’s up to us—the humble consumers—to try ’em and vote with our taste buds here: the winner will be “saved” on shelves. Since this is a game of oatmeal life or death, I figured I’d do my civic duty and eat three breakfasts in a day. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, 7 rating, 8 rating, non cereal, oatmeal, quaker. 16 Comments

Nov. ’16

Guest Review: Nestle Lion Cereal

Soooo: I’ve been in Copenhagen for a week for work and really had no chance to get very far out of the meeting venue and hotel meeting rooms for anything other than fancy dinners. But who the hell reading this site would care about that when such hotel isolation provides an opportunity to try a cereal that can’t be found on this side of the pond?

Obviously, I had to find a local grocery store to see Europe’s exclusive cereal options, and Lion Cereal is one I have seen in the past but never gave a go. My first thought was, “You know what really sucks about a chocolate and caramel cereal based on a candy bar? The answer is not one damn thing!“

I’m looking at you, Twix. The “candy bar cereal” ball is in your court now. Continue reading →

Posted by marc p.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, caramel, nestle. 5 Comments

Oct. ’16

Review: Erewhon Simply Vanilla Granola

Another day, another free granola sample from Attune Foods that I’ll happily review because it means I didn’t have to pay for my own breakfast. But as usual, receiving my morning meal via USPS doesn’t mean that I’ll be pulling any punches or crunches when taste testing.

I accept all free samples, but I give no free rides.

Today’s spotlighted spoonful is Simply Vanilla Granola. With its abbreviated ingredient list, highlighted organic and gluten-free promises, and stout packaging design, this granola really wants to appear simple. It’s a lot like me: I spend a lot of time convincing people I’m a man of simple pleasures, when in reality I have a .txt file of “cool cereal adjectives” saved to my desktop.

Let’s see if Simply Vanilla Granola earns any of those effervescently grandiose adjectives. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, attune foods, erewhon, granola, non cereal, vanilla. 2 Comments

Sep. ’16

Review: Kellogg’s Limited Edition Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Skeleton Marshmallows

The world would be a much happier place if there were skeleton-shaped things in every food.

Spaghetti with skeleton meatballs. Pistachios with skull-shaped nuts inside every shell. Or here’s a really crazy one: chicken wings with actual bones in the middle!

Wait: one of those things is not quite like the others. But it doesn’t matter, because the point is that Kellogg’s newest Halloween cereal is Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Skeleton Marshmallows. It’s the logical next step up from this summer’s Frosted Flakes with Marshmallows, because when you’ve already paired a sugar-coated cereal with concentrated bits of sugar, the only way to make it sweeter for the sweetest season of the year is to add another glaze of corn syrupy malted cocoa.

At this rate, Kellogg’s will be selling Frosted Flakes with complimentary maple syrup bottles and sugar beet seeds in every box by the time Christmas comes around. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, frosted flakes, halloween, kelloggs, marshmallows. 3 Comments

Sep. ’16

Review: Quaker Banana Bonanza Oatmeal and Blueberry Bash Oatmeal

Quick: pretend you’re in 4th grade and it’s lunch time. You sit down at an uncomfortable wooden table, and tear open your hyper-crinkly brown bag while you wait for your friends to come back from the hot lunch line with their spicy chicken sandwiches and Bosco breadsticks.

You’re more than a little jealous of them, but you know Mom had to have packed you something good. So what’s the main course? Ham and cheese on rye? Leftover chow mein from China Kingdom down the road?

Both guesses are wrong. In an attempt to get you eating healthy, Mom packed Quaker’s newest instant oatmeal cup flavors: Banana Bonanza and Blueberry Bash.

But are these oatmeal cones worth trudging over to the school’s vintage, pizza sauce-stained microwave for? Or should you trade them like edible Pokémon cards and try to game Billy out of his Ziploc full of Oreos?

Those are the existential questions I hope to answer.

Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, 7 rating, banana, blueberry, non cereal, oatmeal, quaker. Leave a comment

Aug. ’16

Review: Nature Valley Granola Crunch – Cinnamon & Maple Brown Sugar

Chunks of rock are underrated. Whether you’re gazing at geodes in a museum, winning a piece of the Aggro Crag on Nickelodeon GUTS, or simply throwing things in the quarry with Creed from The Office, chunks of rock are versatile and fun.

And edible chunks of rock are delicious, too. Fruity Pebbles, rock candy, chocolate-covered rocks, and Rocky Road ice cream? All of the above, please! The latest snack to join this honorable lineage of gravel is Nature Valley’s Granola Crunch. These green satchels come in Cinnamon and Maple Brown Sugar, and they promise to contain 21 Nature Valley Granola Bars-worth of flavor-packed ~~oat rectangles that fell apart on the granola bar assembly line~~ lovingly crafted oat bites.

I’ve recently had a personal granola rebirth, so I’m excited to bathe in the warm-baked glory of these craggy crumbs. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, 9 rating, cinnamon, general mills, granola, maple, nature valley. 3 Comments

Jul. ’16

Review: Kellogg’s Cocoa Krispies Treats with M&M’s Minis

Whether it’s ice cream, cappuccinos, pancakes, or Grandpa’s old 1972 Buick, everything’s better when you cover it in chocolate.

Heck, I was even gonna give you my complete, 5000+ item list of things that taste better when slathered in creamy cocoa, but I couldn’t read it because I covered the list in chocolate. Totally worth it, though: this list tastes delicious.

Rice Krispies Treats are no exception to the rule. Kellogg’s “new” Cocoa Krispies Treats—which have probably been released before—come in original and “with Milk Chocolate M&M’s Minis” varieties. Since that’s like IHOP selling Plain Waffles and Belgian Waffles with Maple Syrup for the same price, I predict that boxes of normal Cocoa Krispies Treats will slowly gather dust on grocery shelves until the zombie apocalypse, at which point they’ll be used and traded as valuable currency.

But I’m not here to talk about disappointing, underachieving, and plain Cocoa Krispies Treats. Today is all about his Harvard-bound, candy morsel-stuffed older brother. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, cereal bars, chocolate, kelloggs, rice krispies. Leave a comment