Author Archives: dan g.

27

Jan. ’16

News: General Mills Chooses Its Honorary “Real Trix Rabbit”

Say it with us now: “Aww!”

That’s right, if you recall about 3 months ago, General Mills came up with a not-so-harebrained scheme to crowdsource a new Trix Rabbit. Cereal lovers everywhere were invited to send in picks of their aspiring little bunnies—bunnies who were hungrier for fame than they were carrots.

And now the winner has been crowned. His name is Cinnabun, and he beat out 7,600 other rabbits to take the title. This floppy-eared cutie was rewarded with a celebration at his local Texas Kroger and a limited batch of cereal boxes bearing his adorable likeness.

This batch of boxes was apparently just for the event, though, so for those hoping to see Cinnabun in their cereal aisle: we’re sorry. And for those hoping we’d get a limited edition cinnamon bun-flavored Trix cereal: we’re really sorry (eat some Cinnabon cereal to fill the void). But for those just hoping to see a cute picture of a rabbit: you’re welcome.

Now say this one with us: “Silly Cinnabun, Trix are for kids!”

Posted by . Categories: News. Tags: , . 2 Comments

26

Jan. ’16

Review: Kashi GoLean Clusters Vanilla Pepita

IMG_4252Forget everything Schoolhouse Rock taught you: knowledge clearly isn’t power…plants are! And bills don’t spend their time anthropomorphically singing on the steps of the Capital Building, either, but that’s a misconception for another time.

Alright, I probably shouldn’t mock knowledge. After all, I am in college so that I can be learnin’ me them knowledges. But with all the different powerful plants in Vanilla Pepita—the newest gluten free cereal from Kashi—I can fill any gaps in my education with pepitas, red beans, pea crisps, and sorghum.

Hear that, professor? Who needs degrees when you can have peas?

Continue reading →

Posted by . Categories: Reviews. Tags: , , . 2 Comments

24

Jan. ’16

Review: Skinner’s Raisin Bran from Uncle Sam

IMG_0340Raisin bran cereals are the oatmeal raisin cookies of the cereal world.

Now I’m not just talking about the ingredients, because that’s certainly not a hard comparison to make. What I mean is that raisin bran cereals are the breakfast aisle underdogs. Just like how oatmeal raisin is so often overshadowed by chocolate chip—its suave, popular older brother—raisin bran has had its spotlight unfairly stolen by, well, every other cereal ever.

It must be the word “bran” that naturally turns people off. And for that reason, I recommend that all raisin bran cereals change their name to something cooler, like “Raisin Bandoliers,” “Raisin Bandits,” or even “Raisin Badasses.”

While we wait for this mass raisin bran rebranding to occur, I thought I’d review another existing raisin bran variety to help inform all my fellow defenders of raisin bran and oatmeal raisin cookies. Today’s raisin badass bran? An old school classic: Skinner’s Raisin Bran. Continue reading →

Posted by . Categories: Reviews. Tags: , , . 5 Comments

23

Jan. ’16

News: Cap’n Crunch’s Orange Creampop Crunch Coming Soon?

IMG_0646 (1) copy

(UPDATE 6/8: Orange Creampop Crunch is real, and we reviewed it!)

We’ve had Peanut Butter Crunch. We’ve munched a baker’s dozen bowls of Sprinkled Donut Crunch. Heck, we’ve even consumed an XL, family-sized movie theater tub of Caramel Popcorn Crunch. If Cap’n Crunch has endorsed it, we’ve eaten it.

So what will the Cap’n debut next to bring forth a tidal wave of drool from the hungry whirlpools of our faces? Well, to paraphrase Man of Popsicle, “If it’s Popsicle, it might be possible.”

As some internet sleuths have uncovered, back on November 5th of last year, Quaker filed a trademark application for CAP’N CRUNCH’S ORANGE CREAMPOP CRUNCH. Maybe Cap’n Crunch’s title should be CAPS LOCK-ing Crunch, instead.

From almost any other cereal brand, I’d be concerned about such a zany flavor idea. But since Cap’n Crunch is the same guy who once casually brought us an exploding volcano cereal, I’d trust him even if he debuted “Cap’n Crunch’s Hot Garbage Juice Crunch.”

No word on when (or even if) Cap’n Crunch’s Orange Creampop Crunch will see the light of day, but my guess would be early to mid-summer. And when it does arrive?  You’d better believe I’ll have a bowl of melted orange sherbet ready to pour it in.

What do you all think of this possible new flavor?

Posted by . Categories: News. Tags: , , . 7 Comments

22

Jan. ’16

Review: Kellogg’s Frosted Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts

IMG_4247You might be wondering why it has taken me so long to post a review of these new Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts. As someone who collects Pop-Tarts like they’re sugary pastry trading cards (picture me sliding a Frosted Strawberry into a Yu-Gi-Oh duel disk), I agree that I should have had this review up eons ago.

But I’ve been staring at this box of Pop-Tarts for a solid month now, because I just can’t decide whether I like them.

“Oh, these are terrible!” I’ll mumble to myself, as I slide another Tart in my mouth, chasing it with a glass of milk to form a flowing Maple Bacon Log Flume down through my esophagus.

To quote Kylo Ren: “I’m being torn apart!” I wonder if it was a Maple Bacon Pop-Tart that turned him to the Dark Side. Continue reading →

Posted by . Categories: Reviews. Tags: , , , , . 2 Comments

20

Jan. ’16

Cereal Time with Gabe Fonseca — Batman vs. Superman, Just Right, and Basic 4 Cereals

Need a superhero who can save you from afternoon boredom?

Well fear no more, concerned citizen, because Captain Cereal Time (secret identity: Gabe Fonseca) has released two new videos in his YouTube series that we’d like to share with you.

Though most of you are probably already aware, in the Cereal Time series, Gabe drops fun, historical, and nostalgic knowledge bombs about different cereals each week.

Speaking of which, I wonder when he’ll cover Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs?

The above video features Gabe’s take on General Mills’ buzz-worthy new Batman vs. Superman Cereals. (Gee, I wonder where he managed to find the boxes? 😉)

And while Gabe’s opinion on who won this “cereal clash of the titans” differs from mine, I can still respect it. Because, let’s be honest here, both of these superhero cereals are tasty enough to have blockbuster movies made about them.

They could even bring back George Clooney. After all, he already knows a thing or two about playing a cardboard, lifeless Batman. Continue reading →

Posted by . Categories: Specials. Tags: , , . 1 Comment

19

Jan. ’16

Review: Kellogg’s ToGo Breakfast Mix: Cinnamon Roasted Candied Pecan and Salted Caramel & Praline Almond

IMG_4241Unlike the product it’s reviewing, this review of Kellogg’s new ToGo Breakfast Mixes should not be enjoyed while driving.

This review will not fit in your cupholder.

And licking this review will not produce a savory cinnamon pecan flavor.

So how are they similar? Well, both the breakfast mixes and this review probably shouldn’t be submerged in milk. That’s right: according to the packages themselves, Kellogg’s latest attempt to capture those “on the move” consumers—who have been slowing cereal sales—is meant to be enjoyed as dry finger food, preferably while stuck in rush hour traffic or while leaning away from the smelly guy on the bus.

Heck, you could even scarf ’em down in the brief interval between paying at the 1st window and picking up your McNuggets from the 2nd window at a McDonald’s drive through.

So these resealable, single serving pouches are obviously convenient, but are they tasty? I double-fisted both flavors while flying down the Interstate in order to find out (okay, not really). Continue reading →

Posted by . Categories: Reviews. Tags: , , . 3 Comments

18

Jan. ’16

Spooned & Spotted: Kellogg’s Captain America Civil War Cereal

IMG_0628Confession: I haven’t been watching all the Marvel movies that have been released over the past 5 years or so. In my defense, new superhero films seem to come out just as often as new cereals. So how can I be expected to keep up with both?

What this means is that I don’t have any cheeky, topical references to make about Kellogg’s new Captain America Civil War cereal. From what I can conclude based off the box art alone, the movie is about Captain America pissing off Iron Man by trapping him in a bad Instagram filter. In response, Iron Man decides to steal the left side of Captain America’s face.

You know what? I’d see that movie. It sounds like it would be…all right!

As for this cereal (which I spotted at Meijer), it looks like another cookie cutter oats and marshmallows snoozefest. I will give it a couple bonus points, though, because the pastel red and blue shield marshmallows remind me of Bomb Pops. Oh, if only this cereal were cherry, lime, and raspberry flavored.

But hey, from the looks of this cereal’s shelf neighbors, at least Captain America is strong enough to topple Darth Vader.

If you’d like to see your picture or thoughts featured on a “Spooned & Spotted” post, click yourself right on over to our submissions page, or just email us at cerealously.net@gmail.com.

Posted by . Categories: Specials. Tags: , , . 1 Comment