Cereal is for squares.
No, really. Though of course all food is three-dimensional, especially the well-rounded corn puff, but when it comes to crunchy quadrilaterals, we get a lot of squarish, rectangular, and pillowy things, yet never any perfectionist-pleasing union of six squares. Hence why cereal scholars have been asking for decades: when will breakfast enter its cubist period?
Following their controversial performance piece “The Bastardization of Rice Krispies Treats Cereal,” A.M. auteurs Snap, Crackle and Pop are back with a freshly caramelized coat of paint on last year’s Snap Crackle Poppers. So while I loathe what’s become of RKTC with every snap and crackle of my boiling blood, this line of miniaturized and glazed Treats is actually pretty good—especially the Cookies ‘n’ Creme ones.
It’s surely only a matter of time before Kellogg’s piggybacks off this geometric success to release Raisin Bran bites in the shape of Metatron’s Cube. But in the mean time, let’s see how the Rice Krispies boys’ latest inherently stackable snack stacks up to its predecessors.
Chewy caramel corn. Boom. Review: over.
Just as how the word itself has no consistent pronunciation, caramel as a flavor is difficult to confidently describe. There are certainly nuanced differences between, say, a Werther’s Original and a Girl Scouts Samoa, but apt adjectival differentiators can be tough to pin down—hence why it’s easier to compare a new caramel foodstuff to something more iconic. Case in point, these Caramel Snap Crackle Poppers—a name practically begging for punctuation—instantly evoke the especially buttery and particularly golden-sweet coating on caramel corn—albeit the processed commercial kind. The Rice Krispies Treat core is familiar and unassuming, serving more of a textural purpose than anything distinctly marshmallowian.
Caramel has been attempted in numerous cereals—including caramel corn itself—but none are quite as compelling as the goo gooped onto these Poppers that are breakfast material only in the most abstract sense. This is especially good for caramel corn fans who just wish they could enjoy each piece for a little longer without risking a brown-buttered hull slipping between your molars.
I feel I don’t have much more to add, since the appeal of Caramel Snap Crackle Poppers lies in their simplicity. They may not have the same intriguing depth of flavor as the Cookies ‘n’ Creme kind, but these Poppers are better than Vanilla and on par with Chocolate. If nothing else, those seeking a more complexly caramelized experience can pop a Caramel and Chocolate Popper in their mouth at the same time, rattle them around your palate like a whiskey on the rocks, and enjoy the resultant, Rolo-echoing delight.
Now how do we further miniaturize these to reclaim the Rice Krispies Treats Cereal throne?
The Bowl: Caramel Snap Crackle Poppers
The Breakdown: Simple, sweet and effective, these Poppers are like polyhedrally refined caramel corn bites. You certainly don’t get many per pouch, but what’s there is sure to tide you over ’til your second pouch, seconds later.
The Bottom Line: 7.5 lessons in sacred sucrose-granulated geometry out of 10